The One With The Chatty Cathy's: Video

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Scrad eyes their comm as the hallway passes behind them. They're doing a walk-and-talk: just like on The West Wing! That show is hilarious. Human politics.]

So. Why is everybody introducing themselves and asking if anybody's out there? Is this an invasion?

[Charlie pops onto screen and says:]

Because we, for one, welcome our new already welcomed overlords, and are eager to submit our resume. References available on request.


[Happy 4th Wall Day! 4th wall away!]

Comments

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Scrad nods:]

Yep. You are.

[Charlie says:]

Look, technically we didn't bend you. It wasn't even our idea!

[agentj]

Look, no, see, this is where you sneakily change the subject and offer to rub my feet or somethin', not grab a shovel and dig yourself deeper.

This is hurting my reference for you, Chad. Scarlie.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Would...that work?

[Scrad asks. Charlie wrinkles his nose and mutters:]

Chad?

[agentj]

Hell no, don't you go nowhere near my feet!

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Okay, okay!

[Scrad says, nervously. Charlie adds:]

You don't hafta tell us twice. ...But we've been worse places.

[Scrad agrees:]

Jersey.

[agentj]

....



Yeah that place is pretty nasty.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

So what're you doin' here?

[Scrad asks.]

[agentj]

Got lost on the way to Ikea.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

That's very funny.

[Scrad says. Neither of them are laughing, but Scrad isn't being sarcastic either, so it's possible they do actually think that's funny and are just, you know, from space. They might also just be confused, since they come from the dark days of 2002, when Brooklyn had no Ikea at all, and we had to drive to New Jersey for particle board and meatballs. And yet, even today, they want to charge me $100 to ship a short Billy to the UES. What the hell, Ikea? What the even hell. But I digress.

Charlie asks:]

No. Seriously.

[agentj]

Does this face not look serious to you? [It is serious. Oh so serious. If you looked in the dictionary...]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

It's hard to tell with just the one.

[Scrad says. Now they might be joking. Or maybe not.]

[agentj]

I do got another head, but you can't see that one.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Wow.

[Says Scrad. Charlie is visibly amused.]

You went there. Kay wouldn't go there. But you went there.

[agentj]

...Kay would slap me for going there, actually.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Kay would probably slap us for you going there.

[Scrad suggests. Charlie nods.]

He is not a fun guy.

[agentj]

Hey, now, he can be fun, all right. Case in fact, I have a blast when we're kickin' all kinds of idiot should-be-convict ass.

He's also very good at karaoke.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Yeah, that: he has a little too much fun with.

[Scrad says. Charlie muses:]

He's aware of karaoke?

[agentj]

He's aware of a lot. Way too much. But I was actually being sarcastic about that part. Don't let his fluffy warm exterior fool you, he's not really into social gatherings like that.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

That we coulda guessed.

[Scrad says.]