The One With Fur: Video

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Scrad/Charlie are in their cabin. Scrad/Charlie remain completely huma-...er...norma-...uh...themselves. They're hugging each other, although since they only have the one set of arms, it's sort of awkward. They're both laughing hysterically.]

Yes. Yes. Hell yes. Dodged it. You can allllll suck it.

[Charlie babbles.]

No parrots. No two-headed cows. No nothin'. Ahahahaha.

[Scrad half-laughs, half-sobs.]

Thank god. Thank your hilarious Earth god.

[Charlie continues.]

We deserved this!

[Scrad insists. And maybe they did.

...

No, they probably didn't.]

Comments

[timesbureaucrat]

[Narvin growls, then an angry serious of hyena-like yelps, ending with a woof. If he could speak in words, he'd be saying, "Shut up, you smug nitwit, before I bite you."]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Sorry, we don't speak pointy cat.

[Charlie says. Also he's not sorry.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[More growls of "I am not a pointy cat!"

Just a big Gallifreyan pack predator.]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Aw, is kitty jealous?

[Scrad coos.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[More growls and yowls and vocalization. "I swear I'm going to bite you. Charlie looks like he'd fit in my mouth nicely."]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Was that a threat?

[Charlie asks. Really, he's just guessing.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[A few sharp barks. Higher pitched than one would expect from an animal as large as Narvin is right now. "Of course it's a threat, you two-headed numbskull? Isn't at least one of your brains functioning?"]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Laugh it up, fuzzball. You can bite me.

[Charlie grumbles.]

Yeah, you can bite him.

[Scrad agrees.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[He makes some barking moans: "Can't even think up your own lines?" Narvin's only seen half a dozen movies, but among those half a dozen was the original Star Wars trilogy.]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Narvin you need to get out more. ...By staying in and watching more movies.]

C'mon, that was a great pop culture reference.

[Charlie pouts.]

You can still bite him.

[Scrad says.]

[most_feared]

Looks like you weren't the only one to come out good on this one, Bucko. [Sorry about that. You don't get puppy Kay this time.]

Now can you make yourselves helpful?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[So many games of fetch unplayed. So many asses unbitten.]

We're not...great with animals.

[Scrad admits.]

Not what you'd call responsible.

[Charlie responds.]

[most_feared]

I can see that. [He saw your room, Scrad! The neat freak in him frowned.] But you're the guy with opposable thumbs. Which means someone might need a door opened and unless you wanna step in someone's fecal matter in the corridor it'd be a good idea to put those thumbs to good use.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[They have a system. A throwing-stuff-into-piles system.]

What exactly are you implying we should do with our thumbs?

[Asks Charlie.]

[most_feared]

[He very carefully avoids the comment he wants to make. Very carefully.] Open doors, get food out for them, help 'em out.

Who knows. Someone might pay back the favor.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

In cash?

[Charlie asks, hopefully.

Dogs carry cash, right?]

[most_feared]

They're not Frank. I don't think they know how. They're not used to paws. They might do stuff for you if you need it.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Dog stuff?

[Scrad muses, as if he's not sure what dogs even do.]

[most_feared]

In three days they won't be dogs anymore but you'll still have helped them- you don't think very far ahead, do you?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

How are we supposed to do that?

[Scrad asks.]

Sometimes we don't know what's going on now.

[Charlie admits.]

[most_feared]

You should probably start keeping track of that. Makes it harder for people to dump you.

[He doesn't think the guys will ever be independent but if they're observant at least they'll know when to walk on their own.]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Yeah, but admit it: you'd like to see that.

[Charlie says conspiratorially.]

[most_feared]

No. 'Cause all it ends up is you crying or even dead and them still dicking around New York with a smug look on their face.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

But we, uh, kinda got that coming, don't we?

[Scrad asks.]

[most_feared]

[There's that difficult stumbling point that he tries to deny is there again. You don't really get over someone harassing your daughter; at least he doesn't. But he also made that obligation to keep his logic first and foremost, to refrain from personal involvement. Being pissy about it defeats his role as an agent. Being a father is just something he's generally failed at.

So he settles on this...]

You talked to your warden about it, yet?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Little bit.

[Scrad admits.]

We, uh. You know.

[Charlie tries.]

[strangehistorian]

congradtulations

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Thank you!

[Charlie beams, as if they've actually accomplished something.]