twoheadsofcabbage | The One With The Famous Child Actor [Video + Spam]

[There's a two-headed boy on screen. He's fairly big for his age. Well-fed. Robust. And he's dressed in a complicatedly folded toga. And he's staring. Both of him are. Just staring. Both of his heads are the same size, and the one attached traditionally to his shoulders looks particularly lost. He's attempting to duck behind his second head, which is at this point in their development slightly too heavy for its neck-stalk.

They squirm slightly. They are, for once, not in Scrad/Charlie's spectacularly consumerist room. They'd awoken there, but they have no idea why, or how it happened, or whose things those are, and they're quite sure that they are now in trouble. Because they're always in trouble.

Which is why they've seated themselves on the floor in the hallway and are staring warily at all of you, with your one single heads. Is this their punishment?

Good job. It's terrifying.]

((SPAM. They're on Level 3, in the hallway, being a tripping hazard. Feel free to run into them. Literally. They do not have The Shining.))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[A cute little girl with black pigtails and purple eyes bounces around the corner carrying a bowl of cookies. She wishes she knew where the others are, but she's alleviating the loneliness by poking around into as many minds as she can. People on this Barge are weird and have a lot of hangups, even as kids.]

[She pauses when she sees the little two-headed guy in robes, then wanders over.]

Hi! Are you lost? Do you want a cookie? [Cookies fix everything.]

[They jump at the sound of her voice, as they had been staring blankly at nothing in particular, and that takes a lot of mental effort.]

...No?

[The main head manages, even though neither of them are sure that's the correct word. They aren't lost. They just don't know where they are, or why they've been left here. But they're sure it's where they're meant to be, and that it's all their fault, and...

Something smells yummy.]

[She comes over and flops down cross-legged in front of him, smoothing her little print dress over her legs before holding out the bowl of chockachip cookies.]

Here. You should try these. Are you magic? I'm magic, but I only have the one head.

[They accept the bowl. The whole bowl. And they will eat the whole bowl.]

No.

[The secondary head agrees cheerfully. They don't know what magic is, but they know what cookies are. ...Well, no they don't know that either, but they know what they like.]

We should get you up out of the hallway. It's cold on that floor and some people might be nasty to you if they think you're helpless.

C'n I ask you a question? Are you two people with one body or one person with two heads? Also have you ever seen anyone with one head before because you look like you haven't? Are you from another planet? What's it like? Oo, careful, you might give yourselves a belly-ache.

Have you ever had eggs? Francis taught me to scramble them and the chicken keeps pooing out more. Oh, and is that robe comfortable? Seems like you'd trip over it.

[Wait, that was like six questions. Oh well.]

[That was a lot of questions, and they're hard to focus on, and they aren't sure of all the words yet.]

...He hit me with the wooden.

[Main-Scrad informs her.]

Oh no! Someone tried to hit you already? Oh you poor thing--person--people. Where'd he hit you? Do you need it seen to?

Here.

[Says the second head, as they point down at the floor. He hit them here, in the hallway.]

[Oo, boy, they don't seem very br--okay, she's going to be nice anyway. Good girls are nice.]

No, I um, meant, where are you hurt on your body?

[They both shake their heads no.]

He said yield.

[Repeats Charlie.]

...oh. One of those. Well. Let's get you up off this cold floor. Mum showed me how to make tea. We'll put a hot drink or two into you....

The One With The Famous Child Actor [Video + Spam]

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