The One With One Head [Video]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Scrad is looking angry. And alone. No backpack. No Charlie. He shakes slightly as he speaks.]

I want. The rest of my body back. Right. Now.

If I don't get it, I'm gonna...

[Scrad's eyes dart to the side, and his mouth opens and closes soundlessly, before he just cuts the the feed. Charlie would know what they were gonna do, but he has no idea.]

Comments

[Video]

[flashy_magic]

Um...

[Drake is quiet for a little bit, then a little Drake head pops up from behind him and says,]

What he means to say is, he thinks he has your head. Or at least, another him-like version of Charlie, because I'm not Charlie. I'm Drake. Drake the second?

[Drake, the main Drake, looks at the little head, annoyed.]

Do you ever shut up? Blimey. [He then turns his attention back to Scrad.] Charlie will be back. I don't know where the real Charlie is right now, and I'm willing to bet you got a piece of me, too, but it's not quite the same. My powers aren't aware and aren't...a person like Charlie is.

[private]

[can_has_vodka]

I actually dealt with a port without my telepathy and it fucking well broke me. He's more than a limb, he's your wingman.

Fine. I'll give you my Bartender's manual and you can pop quiz me until you'r e good and soused.

[private]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Well, sort of...

[Actually, on Earth Charlie has been a giant cock-block.]

Good. Where?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Our...[Scrad winces slightly at that slip] experience with people invested in doing damage is a little different from yours.

[umgekehrt]

I was in Fleet. All things considered, I prefer the gym to a brawl on leave or ground combat...

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Admiral chucked him overboard. Because why would I notice a major and vocal part of my body and mental functions was missing, right?

That was sarcasm.

[Because Charlie wouldn't have been sure if that was sarcasm.]

[Video]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

...You stole my head!

[twoheadsofcabbage]

What?

[Scrad is completely confused, mostly because of the two of them, Charlie is usually the one who does the thinking about anything sexual.]

[huge_egomd]

Bummer. [House is totally sincere. He is also unaware he's been affected by the flood. He thinks he's always be a dippy airhead.

Fortunately he's had no urge to shave his head.]

You can get the little dude back, though--right? I mean these floods don't last forever.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

And we prefer staying as far away from someone else's fists as possible.

[umgekehrt]

Fair enough. I trust in my native ability to survive most things. [He indicates his face.]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Oh House. Do you even know that everyone lies anymore? Do you think it's probably lupus now?]

I better. I'm not getting stuck like this. I don't know how you people even stand it.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Like what?

Re: [Video]

[flashy_magic]

I did not steal your head!

[Then little Drake added,] And I'm not your head!

[Then the main Drake clarified,] I didn't consent to this! He was just stuck on me while I was sleeping, the Admiral stole your head. I didn't steal Charlie any more than you stole my powers.

[umgekehrt]

Bottles to the face [points to a scar], shrapnel [points to another scar], more shrapnel [points out of frame], groundcar crash [the one that pins his eyebrow down], close-proximity explosions [he points to what is almost certainly a scar concealed under his shirt] .

That sort of thing.

[huge_egomd]

[He knows about lies; he just doesn't understand why people do it.

And it's NEVER lupus. Not even during a flood.]


I suppose it's just a matter of what you're used to. I've always found one big head is plenty.

But hey--this might not be so bad. You might learn to appreciate each other more, the whole 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' type of thing.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[BRB, suggesting a lupus flood.]

I appreciate myself.

[Actually, no. Not really.]

[Video]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

You know what I-

[Scrad starts to tell Drake #2, before asking:]

Wait, powers?

[huge_egomd]

[House would facepalm himself into unconsciousness :| ]

Sure, but there's always room for personal growth. [Sigh. Yep, this is going to be one of those floods, the kind where he'll be horrified by the things he said once it's over.] This is an excellent opportunity for a little me time, which can only benefit both of you.

[private]

[can_has_vodka]

My room. Faith's acting a little weird. I'm in a shit mood but I won't take it out on you. Anyway, I know what missing the shit out of someone is like, and how it being temporary doesn't always help. I'm dealing with that myself.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

What...what do you mean?

[Because even to Scrad, who is usually not the one who thinks about that stuff, that sounds like you are suggesting he masturbate it out.]

[private]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

You do seem kinda touchy. No biggie, I'm used to it.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Right. That sort of thing. Not a fan.

[umgekehrt]

Avoid the military.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Got that pretty much covered.