The One With One Head [Video]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Scrad is looking angry. And alone. No backpack. No Charlie. He shakes slightly as he speaks.]

I want. The rest of my body back. Right. Now.

If I don't get it, I'm gonna...

[Scrad's eyes dart to the side, and his mouth opens and closes soundlessly, before he just cuts the the feed. Charlie would know what they were gonna do, but he has no idea.]

Comments

[huge_egomd]

...

What happened to the little dude?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Admiral chucked him overboard. Because why would I notice a major and vocal part of my body and mental functions was missing, right?

That was sarcasm.

[Because Charlie wouldn't have been sure if that was sarcasm.]

[huge_egomd]

Bummer. [House is totally sincere. He is also unaware he's been affected by the flood. He thinks he's always be a dippy airhead.

Fortunately he's had no urge to shave his head.]

You can get the little dude back, though--right? I mean these floods don't last forever.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Oh House. Do you even know that everyone lies anymore? Do you think it's probably lupus now?]

I better. I'm not getting stuck like this. I don't know how you people even stand it.

[huge_egomd]

[He knows about lies; he just doesn't understand why people do it.

And it's NEVER lupus. Not even during a flood.]


I suppose it's just a matter of what you're used to. I've always found one big head is plenty.

But hey--this might not be so bad. You might learn to appreciate each other more, the whole 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' type of thing.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[BRB, suggesting a lupus flood.]

I appreciate myself.

[Actually, no. Not really.]

[huge_egomd]

[House would facepalm himself into unconsciousness :| ]

Sure, but there's always room for personal growth. [Sigh. Yep, this is going to be one of those floods, the kind where he'll be horrified by the things he said once it's over.] This is an excellent opportunity for a little me time, which can only benefit both of you.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

What...what do you mean?

[Because even to Scrad, who is usually not the one who thinks about that stuff, that sounds like you are suggesting he masturbate it out.]

[huge_egomd]

[That is not exactly what House meant by 'me time' but he certainly doesn't think it's necessarily a bad idea.]

I mean do something you want to do. Something you like to do. Something you might not be able to do if the little dude was around.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Scrad just stares because what does he even like to do?]

It's too quiet to watch TV even.

[huge_egomd]

I suppose you could go someplace noisy...or you could learn to embrace the silence.

[Embrace the silence...yeah, even he doesn't know what that means. It just sounded good.]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Embrace it? It's terrifying.

[huge_egomd]

Sure, it's a little scary but only because you're not used to it. You just need to look at the positives...like being able to take a dump in private.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

...you go through your whole lives alone, man. How do you do it?

[huge_egomd]

[Shrugs] We don't know any different.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

But don't you want someone to? How do you not...that?

[huge_egomd]

Not all the time, no. That would feel...crowded to me. I don't really like feeling crowded.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

I guess we would.