The One From Russia With Love [Video]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Interior: the boys' cabin. As green and cluttered as usual. The boys are dressed like a hipster's closet vomited on them, and appear to either be working on a beard, or are too lazy to shave. The theme to 'Friends' plays. It is not in English. Charlie turns to the screen and says (in Russian):]

English sucks, by the way.

Comments

[persuadeyou]

[Hipster aliens. She fears for the future. (Is Loki secretly a hipster alien? Oh God.)]

Nicole. Which Earth language did you learn first?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[It's already here.]

English. From the TV.

[Charlie tells her.]

[persuadeyou]

[They're doomed.]

Wow. Impressive, considering what's on TV.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Mostly 'Three Stooges'.

[Scrad admits.]

[persuadeyou]

Now I'm just floored.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Hey, those guys are great.

[Scrad insists. Charlie agrees:]

Masters of their craft.

[persuadeyou]

Yeah, but I'm still waiting for the 'nyuck nyuck nyucks.'

[twoheadsofcabbage]

We could go there if you wanted us to.

[Charlie says.]

[persuadeyou]

On second thought, please don't.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Ladies' choice.

[Charlie purrs. Scrad just looks like he wishes his penis would shut up, but is resigned to that never happening.]

[persuadeyou]

[At least she is going to outright ignore that purring. Natasha draws the line at flirting with extra tiny heads, okay, she has limits. Sorry Charlie. :c]

So why did you pick up Russian?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[They shrug, and Charlie jerks his head in the direction of one of their many TV sets. Scrad says:]

It was on.

[persuadeyou]

Bored?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

All the time.

[Charlie says. Scrad continues:]

But in this case we were just pissed about the toga thing.

[persuadeyou]

...Dare I ask?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

The usual this-place crap. Turned into somebody we aren't. Again.

[Scrad says. Charlie explains:]

Well, somebody we coulda been, I guess. Not that that's any better. The homeworld is basically a big ball of suck.

[persuadeyou]

Oh. That one.

[Hn no keep the focus on him, she doesn't want to talk about this one.] What's the homeworld like?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Everybody's really into themselves.

[Charlie says.

Draw your own conclusion.]

[persuadeyou]

[Welp.] And everyone's got...two personalities?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Two heads.

[Scrad corrects her. Charlie says:]

Saying you've got two personalities is a great way to get locked up on our planet.

[persuadeyou]

Oh. Sorry. Is that why you left?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

We just never felt like we fit in.

[Charlie says.]

[persuadeyou]

I'm not really surprised.