The One From Russia With Love [Video]

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Interior: the boys' cabin. As green and cluttered as usual. The boys are dressed like a hipster's closet vomited on them, and appear to either be working on a beard, or are too lazy to shave. The theme to 'Friends' plays. It is not in English. Charlie turns to the screen and says (in Russian):]

English sucks, by the way.

Comments

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Finally!

[Scrad says. Charlie adds:]

Thank you.

[Scrad continues:]

It's like they did it on purpose.

[persuadeyou]

[Man this watching two heads thing is odd and needs to be gotten used to. But she shrugs, quirking a smile.]

Honestly? They probably did.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[It's not that weird: all men have a second, smaller, less socially adjusted head that pops up and embarrasses them on a regular basis, don't they? #penisjokes]

Seems like that might be giving them too much credit.

[Charlie says.]

[persuadeyou]

[#loling irl]

Sneaky is the only credit you really need to give them.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[#Yourewelcome]

We were thinking more like, uh...

[Be honest, you idiots, you weren't thinking anything.]

[persuadeyou]

[She'll wait. For .2 seconds.]

...Anything?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Kinda got away from us.

[Charlie admits, slipping back into English.]

[persuadeyou]

[Natasha shrugs, and follows suit.]

Happens to the best of us. What's your native language?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

We're not from Earth.

[Scrad explains. Charlie adds:]

You wouldn'ta heard of it.

[Hipster aliens. But Scrad does helpfully...themselves.]

Name's Scrad.

[He points to his smaller head.]

He's Charlie.

[persuadeyou]

[Hipster aliens. She fears for the future. (Is Loki secretly a hipster alien? Oh God.)]

Nicole. Which Earth language did you learn first?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[It's already here.]

English. From the TV.

[Charlie tells her.]

[persuadeyou]

[They're doomed.]

Wow. Impressive, considering what's on TV.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Mostly 'Three Stooges'.

[Scrad admits.]

[persuadeyou]

Now I'm just floored.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Hey, those guys are great.

[Scrad insists. Charlie agrees:]

Masters of their craft.

[persuadeyou]

Yeah, but I'm still waiting for the 'nyuck nyuck nyucks.'

[twoheadsofcabbage]

We could go there if you wanted us to.

[Charlie says.]

[persuadeyou]

On second thought, please don't.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

Ladies' choice.

[Charlie purrs. Scrad just looks like he wishes his penis would shut up, but is resigned to that never happening.]

[persuadeyou]

[At least she is going to outright ignore that purring. Natasha draws the line at flirting with extra tiny heads, okay, she has limits. Sorry Charlie. :c]

So why did you pick up Russian?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[They shrug, and Charlie jerks his head in the direction of one of their many TV sets. Scrad says:]

It was on.

[persuadeyou]

Bored?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

All the time.

[Charlie says. Scrad continues:]

But in this case we were just pissed about the toga thing.

[persuadeyou]

...Dare I ask?

[twoheadsofcabbage]

The usual this-place crap. Turned into somebody we aren't. Again.

[Scrad says. Charlie explains:]

Well, somebody we coulda been, I guess. Not that that's any better. The homeworld is basically a big ball of suck.